People tend to overestimate the impact of future events. That is, they predict that future events will have a more intense and more enduring impact on their personal lives than they actually do. Psychologists call this the impact bias. Harvard Psychologist Daniel Gilbert writes: “We’ve done dozens of studies in both the laboratory and the field, and the general strategy of the research is really very simple: We ask people to predict how they will feel minutes, days, weeks, months, or even years after some future event occurs, and then we measure how they actually do feel after that event occurs. If the two numbers differ systematically, then we have one of those interesting and unusual systematic errors I mentioned. We’ve seen the impact bias in just about every context we’ve studied. For example, we’ve studied numerous elections over the last few years, and voters invariably predict that if their candidate wins they’re going to be happy for months, and if their candidate loses they’ll be unhappy for months. In fact, their happiness is barely influenced by electoral outcomes.”. Will You Be Happy If Your Candidate Wins?, Real Estate Magazine, April 2004
There has been a whirlwind of stress or a cloud of euphoria moving around erratically since the election depending on which side you were on. The thrill of victory or the agony of defeat. We will likely be slicing and dicing our way through explanations, rationalizations, examinations and justifications for what just happened for years. But, sooner than you may think, we will likely move on to other things. I made a list of existential risks that could potentially destroy humanity as we know it. The list includes communicable diseases (plagues, flus, viruses, etc), natural disasters (asteroids, earthquakes, volcanoes, etc), social media, nuclear war, global warming and artificial intelligence. No where on the list is Donald J. Trump.
Am I happy that he will once again be our President? No. Do I abhor most everything he represents? Yes. But life will go on as it always has. At least I think it will. I sent this little expression of my personal point of view to family and friends: It was not what I hoped for or what I expected but I congratulate my Republican friends and for the sake of my country and those I love I wish them the best. For what it’s worth I see two possibilities. EITHER much of what I believe is inaccurate, many of my values don’t matter, and democracy can be trusted to choose wisely OR the country is in for a very dark road ahead. For all of our sakes I hope for the first and not the second. It’s time for me to do a deep personal evaluation, not easy but necessary. I ask the winners to govern with humility and compassion and respect for those of us in the minority. It’s a struggle for me to see a bright future for my grandchildren but a struggle worth taking so I will. William Blake’s great poem Jerusalem resounds in my ears and fosters resolve in my heart.
Regarding the “impact bias” described above there are many examples worth citing. I will pick just two. The first from Charles Dickens A Tale of Two Cities. One of the themes of his novel is that things are not always as they seem.
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way – in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only.”
Things often turn out quite differently than we expect. That leads me to my second example, The Story Of The Chinese Farmer, which I will present in the form of this video by Alan Watts.
The Story of the Chinese Farmer
“Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.” – Winston Churchill
Once upon a time there was a Chinese farmer whose horse ran away. That evening, all of his neighbors came around to commiserate. They said, “We are so sorry to hear your horse has run away. This is most unfortu- nate.” The farmer said, “Maybe.” The next day the horse came back bringing seven wild horses with it, and in the evening everybody came back and said, “Oh, isn’t that lucky. What a great turn of events. You now have eight horses!” The farmer again said, “Maybe.”
The following day his son tried to break one of the horses, and while riding it, he was thrown and broke his leg. The neighbors then said, “Oh dear, that’s too bad,” and the farmer responded, “Maybe.” The next day the conscription officers came around to conscript people into the army, and they rejected his son because he had a broken leg. Again all the neighbors came around and said, “Isn’t that great!” Again, he said, “Maybe.”
The whole process of nature is an integrated process of immense complexity, and it’s really impossible to tell whether anything that happens in it is good or bad — because you never know what will be the consequence of the misfortune; or, you never know what will be the consequences of good fortune.
Often we label our experience as “bad” if we hate it. And “good” if we like it. But the bad cannot exist without the good, and vice versa.
Whatever happens in our life, we’ll never know the consequences it may bring in the future.
So, take a deep breath. For a stress relief exercise recommended by the Mayo Clinic, head over to THIS SITE.
MAYO CLINIC STRESS RELIEF EXERCISE
Need a few minutes to relax?
Get comfortable in your chair. Loosen any tight, uncomfortable clothing. Let your arms rest loosely at your side. Allow yourself a few moments to relax.
If your thoughts wander, just let them while gently moving your attention back to the relaxation. If you become anxious or uncomfortable, stop the relaxation by clicking on the pause button.
To begin, focus your eyes on the candle flame. Notice its simplicity and its beauty.
Take time to notice your breathing, gradually slowing down the rate of inhaling and exhaling as you become more comfortable.
Now relax and enjoy the feeling.
Close your mouth and relax your shoulders, releasing any tension that’s built up.
Inhale slowly and deeply through your nose. Let the air you breathe in push your stomach out.
Hold your breath in as you slowly count to four.
Breathe out slowly through your mouth as you continue counting up to six.
Breathe in (three, four, five, six).
Hold (two, three, four).
Breathe out (three, four, five, six).
Breathe in (three, four, five, six).
Hold (two, three and four).
Breathe out (three, four, five, six).
Breathe in (three, four, five, six).
Hold (two, three, four).
Breathe out (three, four, five, six).
Breathe in (three, four, five, six).
Hold (two, three, four).
Breathe out (three, four, five, six).
Breathe in (three, four, five, six).
Hold (two, three, four).
Breathe out (three, four, five, six).
Continue breathing in (four, five, six).
Hold (two, three, four).
And out (three, four, five, six).
Remember, if stray thoughts enter your mind, gently return your attention to the relaxation.
Now, as you breathe out, silently and calmly repeat to yourself:
My breathing is smooth and rhythmic.
My breathing is smooth and rhythmic.
My breathing is easy and calm.
My breathing is easy and calm.
It feels very pleasant.
If you’d like, you may close your eyes now and focus on the music, or continue to look at the flame.
Continue to repeat to yourself:
My breathing is smooth and rhythmic.
My breathing is smooth and rhythmic.
I am peaceful and calm.
I am peaceful and calm.
Continue to take deep, rhythmic breaths. Let the tension fade away each time you breathe out. Let the music soothe you.
If you’ve closed your eyes, gently open them and gaze at the candle flame.
Return to your day peaceful, more focused and relaxed.
But…but…there’s the torture of constantly seeing his face and hearing his voice. It’s like being forced into an arranged marriage, finally ditching the scoundrel, but then a few years later he hunts you down in your little village and forces you into marriage again…and here comes the wedding night.
Yea, I’ve decided to avoid all that. I’ve stopped watching political shows or reading political news. I suppose it’s irresponsible but I don’t care. I’m going to focus on reading and writing. It does make family get togethers more difficult as there are a few MAGAtons in the mix but I simply ignore them or give them a silly smile if the say anything or say No! No! No! and point my finger at them “We won’t have any of that here.” My house, my rules. So far I’ve been successful but it’s only been a few days so I can’t say its been a success. You know the drill, Don’t Look Up as the movie title says.